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{a note to my readers}

My blog usually highlights the exciting and fast pace lifestyle of my 20-something life in the big city and travels around the world.  And, I usually have a lot to write about.  But, as you may have noticed, the past few months have left much to be desired on my blog.  Lately, I’ve been only sporadically inspired in the writing department.

I sit down at my computer every day, log in to WordPress, and click “New Post.”  For the next few minutes I stare at a blank screen.  I start to write a few sentences, and realize those sentences will bore even me, let alone my audience, and close my laptop screen.

Writing is supposed to be my art form, my lifeline, my communication to the outside world.  But, lately, it only seems a burden to publish the things I really feel.  I spoke to my sister about how I was feeling and she suggested I just be honest with my audience.  That no one expects my life to be this perfect one-way street filled with cotton candy and airplanes and lattes in tiny cafes in Italy all the time.

I don’t think it’s in most human’s nature to be completely honest all the time.  We want people to like us, find us interesting, beautiful, smart, funny.  We don’t want people to know about our bad days, breakups, the loss of a job, or the fact that maybe we just can’t juggle everything we thought we could.  You know: Regular human stuff.

So here it goes…honesty.

I recently lost the most important thing in the world to me.  Something I loved more than I ever knew I could love one single thing.

Losing something so dear to me came as shock, because up until recently, my life had been predictable.  Things, for the most part, had gone pretty much they way I planned them.  I anticipated, prepared for, and accepted most events in my life with a smile and an open mind.

Then one day, something came into my world so fast, so completely unexpected, that it threw me for the biggest loop of my life.  Then, seemingly just a moment later, it was gone as quickly as it came, leaving me exposed to the harsh aftermath.

When you lose something or someone dear to you, you are left with a flurry of unsettled emotions, which in my case, meant there was no more room for writing.  My thoughts were consumed with this one subject, instead of focusing on the road ahead, full of new and exciting experiences.   You can’t possibly prepare for something unexpected, so when it happens it’s hard to react in the most mature, logical way.

One important thing I’ve learned through all of this is the human’s ability to heal, and that’s exactly what I plan to continue to do.